Lent to Easter Home Ed Blogging - Day 1

This is the time of day where I can wind down a little, especially when Phill is home. I can come upstairs and plan the next day's activities before I am tired, and while the children are happy to sit and have some tv time or play with Phill (or nap as Ellizabeth is doing now!).

I like to have rhythm to our days as we all know what to expect and it generally goes with what Charles and Ellizabeth like to do anyway. 

Today we started by getting out some toys that are really good for fine motor skills. We have the bead maze and the train set from Ikea, both are great for this. The three of us sat together talking about the colour of the beads, and their shapes and Charles made up a story about his train, and where it was going. These two toys are wooden, and lovely and £15 for the two of them! 

Next we had snack time, we had a lovely banana, chocolate, peanut butter, soy smoothie each. Yum! 

After snack time we sat and read some books, luckily as it is Saturday, Phill is home so we all sat together, the four of us and read several stories. 

After some stories Charles and Ellizabeth had some free play time while we sorted out some lunch and prepared some afternoon activities. 

I made puffy paint! 

We had a quick walk together, to do some colouring spotting. We saw a grey tree, orange bricks, a blue car, a yellow house and a brown fence. It was fun! 

Charles wanted to forgo doing number work, so we moved onto some arts and crafts using the puffy paint I'd made earlier. 

http://happyhooligans.ca/homemade-puffy-paint/

Charles' is on the left and Ellizabeth's is on the right. 

After the puffy paint it was time to go and visit my grandparents, while we were there Charles was practising some counting of blocks. So after saying he didn't want to do any number work today, he did some of his own accord which made me laugh a little! 

Once we were home Charles got out his letter stencils and asked me to help him write his name. He practised twice with the stencils and then had a go on his own. He did a great job and I'm so proud of him! :) 

Top: with stencils

Bottom: without stencils!

After the stencils we decided to learn about hail, we'd been caught out in some when we were leaving Nannie and Grandad's and Charles wanted to know how the rain became "ice rain". We have a book about weather, so we had a read about hail, and Phill and Charles looked at wind and how much it rains in different places in the world as well. 

They are now having some tv time while I blog and Phill sorts out some tea for us all. 

I have a rough timetable that we try and follow, and I also have a curriculum set out that covers the Early Years Foundation Stage. Ellizabeth gets included in that, so she also does activities that she can do and thrive with. 

That's all for now, 

Have a great night! 

Emma x

 

Lent.

So we have decided to "try to not buy takeaways or convenience foods" for lent and saving the money we might have spent. Hopefully we'll eat healthier and save money at the same time. 

I've also decided to blog our home education activities for lent. Every day until Easter Sunday. Hopefully I will be in the habit of blogging by then! 

Stay tuned and later on today I will do our day's diary. 

Emma x

Our Parenting Style...

I've been asked by quite a few friends over my time as a mum what we do in regards to certain parenting subjects so I thought I'd write a blog post about our ways. I have included links to certain things.

Pregnancy & Labour
When I was pregnant with my first child, Charles I was super careful about everything I ate and drank. I didn't lift anything heavy and I rested a lot. I took pre-natal vitamins religiously. I wrote a colour coded birth plan. When I was pregnant with Ellizabeth, my second child, I was a lot less pedantic. I drank a tiny bit of alcohol on a special occasion, I had pate on toast once and I ate brie a few times too. I took folic acid for the first 12 weeks and ate a really good balanced diet. My birth plan was short and sweet, "delay cord clamping as long as possible, let me deliver in the pool, and do not under any circumstances give my baby formula, pump it from me, or call XXX and use their stash of donor milk as previously agreed"

If we have anymore children in this way I will take more time out for myself to focus on my unborn child and I will plan a home pool birth with delayed cord clamping and of course, 2 years + of breastfeeding. :-D

I will also drink my placenta in a smoothie and encapsulate the rest.
https://www.placentanetwork.com/placenta-smoothies/
https://www.placentanetwork.com/placenta-encapsulation/

Newborns
We strongly believe in the "fourth trimester" theory.

Fourth trimester - http://sarahockwell-smith.com/2012/11/04/the-fourth-trimester-aka-why-your-newborn-baby-is-only-happy-in-your-arms/

My newborns are rarely cuddled by other people. Letting anyone but my husband (or other children) cuddle my newborn makes me edgy for the first 6 weeks or more. I assert my authority and priviledge wherever I go. I AM THE MAMA! 

I breastfeed, as you all know. The first few weeks are spent breastfeeding a lot. I breastfeed on demand, I do not record my baby's feeds, I do not time them. I just let baby feed, whenever and wherever they want to. Sometimes baby goes in the sling and feeds for an hour or more, other times they are in my arms and feed for five minutes. Whatever baby asks for, baby gets.
Explaining why breastfed babies behave the way they do, and that your baby is normal - http://theleakyboob.com/2011/08/baby-explains-normal-newborn-behavior/

I do not like formula or the companies that make formula. The companies are full of shit to be quite honest and the use clever marketing to make you think they are ok. I don't tend to preach about my feeling about formula but I would never give it to my children. If I ever adopt a baby, I will take drugs to induce lactation. If I couldn't breastfeed I'd use donor milk, hire a wet nurse or ask a relative to re lactate for me. If I had to use formula, I'd use goat milk formula as it is more easily digested by the human body. I do not get into conversations about breastfeeding vs formula. I do not judge if you use formula. As long as you've made an informed and educated choice, I have no problem. :-)

Reasons to not use formula - http://www.bellybelly.com.au/pregnancy/baby-formula#.VNYt-PmsW2o

Goat milk - http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/feeding-eating/feeding-infants-toddlers/goat-milk


We don't put our newborns in a pram. Not at all. Nope, not even for five minutes. They are carried in arms or in a stretchy wrap.
Reasons to carry your baby - http://www.naturalchild.org/guest/laura_simeon.html

We room share and bed share, or co sleep. If done safely it is better for your child's emotional wellbeing than sleeping in a cot, crib or moses basket.

If you have not been drinking, smoking or taking drugs and are not so tired that you are drowsy you are safe to co sleep. This goes for Dad's too. My husband is not allowed to sleep with us if he has had an alcoholic drink just before bed. He has to sleep in the bunk beds. Can you tell we don't drink much? ;-)

Here is an article we like about co sleeping - http://www.naturalchild.org/jan_hunt/familybed.html

Obviously the points about abuse do not apply to us but the others remain. My children sleep a lot better when they are together in the bed, even if my husband and I are not in the bed. Charles and Ellizabeth love to snuggle up to each other, they even hold hands and cuddle in their sleep.

We have used dummies but limit use of them for getting to sleep only when they've been particularly sucky. We do not let them have a dummy past the age of 6 months to protect their teeth and speech development.

We also use cloth nappies from the start. Here are some links for you - http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2014/may/09/why-i-prefer-to-use-cloth-nappies-and-cut-down-on-landfill
- http://bumdealnappies.co.uk/info_why-use-cloth-nappies/

Older Babies

We still carry and breastfeed and cosleep, and cloth bum!

My only real point in this one is weaning. We do not use purees. I have never pureed a single meal and don't intend to start now. Personally I think it is a blooming waste of time and baby food jars/packets are full of God knows what. No thank you not for my babies.

I literally just cook for my husband and I, and once they are past 6 months I let them steal food from my plate and put it in their mouths. Once they are regularly stealing food at every meal, they get their own in a highchair/floor seat, facing us, so we can eat as a family.

Then, I again just plonk food on their tray, the same as it is on my plate and let them try it.

You cannot do a mixture of baby led weaning and traditional or puree weaning. You are not doing baby led weaning if you aren't doing it completely. If you use purees and finger foods, then that is what it is. It is still not baby led weaning.

When using purees the baby has to learn to swallow the food, and them learn to chew, which is great until they hit a lump of food...what next?! Choking hazard!

Do you swallow your food before you chew it? No? Me neither!

I chew food before I swallow it, which is what baby led weaning teaches your baby to do.

If you are having soup, or yoghurt then load the spoon for baby and let them take it from you. It's messy, but it's natural. Children who learn to eat in this way as less likely to choke as they are doing it all at their own pace. Hence the term BABY LED!

Here is some information about baby led weaning - http://www.babyledweaning.com/some-tips-to-get-you-started/

Now, let's all learn together the difference between GAGGING and CHOKING.

Gagging - They make a coughing sound. The food has gone to the back of their MOUTH and they are making that sound as they toss it to the front with their tongue. This is natural, normal and good! If they didn't gag, they'd choke....you see? Gagging is a reflex that is stimulated at the back of the tongue.

Choking - If a baby is choking, their wind pipe will be blocked, so they will not be able to make a noise. There will be no coughing, because coughing takes air. If the wind pipe is blocked, there will be no air.
Here is an article that shows you what choking is like and what to do if your child is choking. http://kidshealth.org/parent/firstaid_safe/home/choking.html

We don't use babywalkers or jumperoos or things as we feel they are unsafe.

(babywalkers could knock over items and hurt baby and jumperoos are not ergonomic aka knee to knee so not advised for more than 10 minutes at a time, so what's the point?!)

We also do not leave our children to cry. No cry it out, and no controlled crying. My personal, and very strong feelings are that is neglectful. Below are some articles supporting my beliefs
- http://www.naturalchild.org/guest/pinky_mckay.html
-http://www.phdinparenting.com/blog/2008/7/5/cry-it-out-cio-10-reasons-why-it-is-not-for-us.html

Toddler

I do not wean from the breast onto formula or cows milk. What is the point exactly? Follow on milks were invented so formula companies could advertise them as they are not allowed to advertise first infant milks. It's a gimic stick with breastfeeding or infant formula until 1 year and then use full fat cows milk, or an alternative milk if that is your choice.

If my toddler needs a drink of milk, and I am not around or do not have any breast milk expressed then they have goat, soy, oat or hemp milk. Occasionally they will have cows milk.

I keep my toddler in soft soled shoes until they are two years old. The arch of the foot does not develop until a child is two years old. A hard sole shoes does not give your child's foot enough wiggle room to grow and flex like it needs to before the arch is developed. A soft soled shoe however does.

http://www.livestrong.com/article/557194-what-are-the-benefits-of-soft-sole-shoes-for-babies/
http://www.kidoshoe.com/things-every-parent-should-know-about-their-children%E2%80%99s-feet

Here are some examples of soft soled shoes, often called pre-walkers - http://www.clarks.co.uk/p/26105636
- http://www.startriteshoes.com/pre-walkers.html

Extended rear facing carseats. I agree with this totally. The only reason we didn't do it is because we couldn't afford it. The cheapest seats are around £130 and it was just not in our price range.
Reasons to rear face - http://www.rearfacing.co.uk/
Cheapest rear facing seat on the market in the UK - http://www.toysrus.co.uk/Babies-R-Us/Travel-and-Pushchairs/Car-Seats-and-Boosters/Group-0-1-and-2/Joie-Stages-Carseat-in-Midnight%280100430%29

Preschool and Older
I can't take you much further than this point as my eldest is only 3 years old.

I didn't rush potty training, it just happened on it's own. Charles is now confidently using the potty, with no accidents. I've not done a thing. I just let him do his own thing, and he's dry and clean now, day and night.

We are home educating. Charles attends preschool twice a week for the morning to give me time with his little sister. He does no formal learning there. Ellizabeth probably won't go at all. It is not compulsory to send your child anywhere, to preschool or primary school or secondary school. It is however compulsory to educate your child from the term after he or she turns five years old. For my children, whose birthdays are in January, they must be educated from the end of April in the year they turn five years old (2017 and 2019, if you were interested!). We follow a preschool curriculum, and will follow the national curriculum in English, Maths and Science. The rest of their subjects we will encourage but let them lead. They will learn History, but they can choose the era, etc. We already attend several home education groups, so there is plenty of socialisation.

School is an opt in service. It is not compulsory, education is. If you would like our reasons for home educating, please comment and I will do my best to answer your polite queries.

Our children continue to share a bed with us until they choose to move into their own bed.


That is all I can think of to tell you about our parenting.

I've been honest, I hope I've not hurt anyone's feelings. I always say the only person who can put guilt on you, is yourself.

I hope you enjoyed reading my essay and the links provided.

Happy educated and informed parenting! Happy Baby = Happy Mama! :-)

Emma x

I'm not talking right now..

I've always had a lot to say. I've always been a communicator, I like to talk. My husband always says that he knows there is something wrong when I'm not talking.

I'm not talking right now. I just can't. I'm not texting you, I'm not messaging you on Facebook, and I am not calling anyone but my Dad.

I just can't.

My heart is broken, it's in millions of little pieces and I'm lying to you when I am saying I am doing ok, that I'm fine. That laughter, those smiles, all lies.

I was blessed by God to have my grandfather in my life. He was an angel, made of pure gold, and I honestly don't know how I will ever get along without him.

I picked up the phone today, and I nearly rang him. I wanted to ask him a question about growing carrots. I completely forgot he was dead.

He's dead. Actually gone from my life. I'll never hear him say I love you again. I'll never hear him chuckle, or say "cheerio" as he leaves, ever again.

It's breaking my heart.


So don't expect me to call, don't expect a text. I won't be emailing you or messaging you on Facebook.

But it doesn't mean I need you any less. I need you to talk to me, I need you to ask me to tell you about him, about our time together. Just because I can't get the words out on my own, doesn't mean you can't coax them out.

I miss my Grandad, but I am grateful he passed on his infinite knowledge to my Dad. He answered the carrot question. If I grow it them in 100% manure, they won't grow as well as in a mix of top soil and manure. Lol. :)

My grandfather, My friend.

 Bryan Leopold Curtis

29th August 1924 - 25th January 2015

Father, Grandfather, Friend.

Dear Grandad,

I know you won't think I am silly where you are, writing you a letter. I know that you know everything I feel and want to say, and even if I could say it to you that I wouldn't need to. You were one of the smartest guys I've ever known, so of course you know.

The last 10 days have been precious. I've got to spend some special time with you, holding your hand, combing your hair and telling you how I feel.

On the first day you were at the end of life unit, we chatted, didn't we? We talked about the children and how Ellizabeth has your mum's red hair. We talked about Charles and how clever he is, how he makes us both laugh. You told me you loved me, and kissed my hand. I managed to swallow the lump in my throat and tell you I loved you too, so so much. I kissed your cheek, and your head and just breathed you in. You've always smelt lovely. Sounds strange, but it's true.

The next day, I spent 6 hours with you. The longest I've ever spent away from Ellizabeth, you knew this and you were worried about me. You know how I hate to be away from my children, you know how I am devoted to them. You told me that I shouldn't spend so much time with you, that I should be with my beautiful babies. You told me you loved them, and you told me you loved me. I had to leave the room I was sobbing so hard. I love you so damn much, and the thought of losing you became too much to bear.

You became sleepier and sleepier and when I saw you yesterday you didn't seem to know I was there. I kissed you goodbye and breathed you in again. I told you to be good, always our little joke. I made a joke to my aunt and uncle, that I knew you were cheeky after a glass of wine, and that you'd flirt with the nurses. You were always a bit cheeky after a glass of red wine. You made me laugh.

It was just too hard to see you in pain yesterday. I had never seen you even look sad before. It broke my heart. You've always been so strong, and to see you suffer and struggle was so heart breaking. I love you, and I have been praying that God would relieve you, call you home because I didn't want you to suffer any more.

I've been thinking lots about our 24 years together. My first memory of you is when I was 2. I got a plastic tool kit for Christmas and I was really happy because I had a saw like you. I knew you used to be a joiner. I was so pleased that I could be a joiner too, that I could be like you. I wanted so much to be like you.

My next clear memory of you was when I was 3. We went on holiday to Cornwall, Dad, Mum, you and me. We walked on the beach, and you held my hand. You swung me round. It was after Nanny left you, I remember making you smile.

I remember you and Josie, your partner, taking me and her grandson Lee to Adventure Wonderland in Hurn when I was about 6. You rode some of the rides with me and pretended they made you feel sick. Did they really make you feel sick? It certainly made me laugh either way. You always did know how to make me smile.

I remember staying with you for the weekend when I was 7. Mum and Dad went to Paris for the weekend and I begged them to let me stay at your house. You bought me loads of colouring books and pencils. I made a door sign that said "keep out" on the bedroom I was sleeping in. I remember telling you it was for monsters, not for you.

I remember playing with your Newton's Cradle. I remember tangling it up one day and being terrified you'd be cross. You weren't. You just untangled it and told me not to be so rough next time.

I remember you always kept colouring pencils and paper in your middle drawer in your display cabinet. I remember going to it without asking you, and you keeping me in line, reminding me to be polite and ask first. You were always kind, never harsh.

I remember you slipping me £2 coins when you thought my Dad wasn't looking. You always told me to spend it on something nice, or keep it for another day. I think I always spent it on sweets at G&T's.

I remember always recognising your handwriting, and you always writing "Lots of love, Grandad (Bry)" and I always teased you, saying how I recognised your handwriting and that I didn't need you to write Bry!

I remember telling you I was pregnant with my son. You were actually really happy. I was worried you'd be cross. You really liked Phillip when you met him, and you were super proud when we got married. You were really chuffed when you found out I was having a boy and you told me you like the name Charles.

I remember you coming round when he was just four days old, because you couldn't wait to have a look at him. Your first great grandchild. You said he was beautiful, and you said I'd done a good job. You were really happy when I told you I was breastfeeding. You said you were proud of me.

I remember you holding him for the first time. You said he was so tiny, you were worried you'd drop him. I took a photo. I wanted to cherish the moment and I do.

When I told you I was expecting again, you were really happy. It was a girl, a daughter. You were over the moon. She has red hair, like your Mum did. You were so happy and so pleased there was another red head in the family. I hope she doesn't go dark, like I did. I hope she stays "Rose Red". You told me how beautiful you thought she was. I agreed, are we both biased? I don't think so. Her smile lights up the world, doesn't it? Maybe she gets it from you, I think you had that effect on the world too. You made it better just by being in it.

You were, you are the most special person ever. You were handsome and funny and so smart. I was proud to call you my grandfather. I love you, and I always will love you. I miss you, and I always will miss you.

See you later Grandad (Bry).

All my love, always and forever,

Emma x

January plans

We aren't planning much for the last week of January.

On Monday, we are heading over to Kingston Lacy to meet with some other home educating families. It will be our first big meet that has lots of older children.

On Tuesday, we are going to build our own calendar to hang on the wall. We've been talking about the weather, and the seasons. Charles enjoys looking out the window each morning and describing the weather to me before we get ready for the day. It helps us choose our clothes for the day.

On Wednesday, Charles may go to preschool. If he doesn't we'll have a chat about winter and maybe do some winter themed crafts. If the weather is nice we will see if my Nanny wants to come to the park with us in the afternoon.

On Thursday, we are planning a family trip to Ikea. Yay! Charles enjoys trying all the sofas and beds and playing with the toys. Mama and Daddy like to dream shop new furniture, fabrics and gadgets. *smile*

On Friday we probably won't do very much. It might be a lazy day, or we might take a trip to the library and read some books that we don't have a home.

Moving on;

Charles has been asking for some time for pocket money. He sees a toy or a magazine that he would like to buy and asks us for money to get it. We nearly always say no, mainly because we can't afford it but also because we both feel really strongly about him earning the money to buy things he wants, even from this early age.

I told him, that if he did 4 jobs for me around the house each day I could pay him. My rate is 4p per day. Today he was very keen to do jobs for me, and was pestering me most of the morning for chores to do. *smile* Let's see how long he keeps it up. Today he swept the floor in the kitchen, checked on the outside animals, picked up dirty laundry and put it in the hamper and tidied up his toys. So he got his 4p. I have left it out for him, so he'll get it in the morning when he comes down. I can't wait to see his face.

He also was pretty cool today when it came to potty training. He was in pants most of the morning and early afternoon and only had one sort of accident. We even went for a walk to the shop (1.5 hrs!). He sat down on the potty when we got back from our walk, and in his haste forgot to pull his pants and trousers down. Bless his heart. *smile*. He did a really good job though! We are going to try him again tomorrow in pants and see how he does. I think we are really heading towards being potty ready now! I am so excited for him!

Ellizabeth is saying a few words now, Mama, Dada, Dars (Charles), Dog, Cat, "What's that", Hiya, Bye Bye, Get, and That. I think there are a few more but I cannot remember them just now.
She's also learnt to high five. It is very sweet.

I saw my Grandad today. It was very hard. He is not really here anymore, and they are raising his morphine to make him sleepier. It is hard to talk about without being very sad and crying. I love him very much, and will miss him terribly when he is gone. I am thanking God for this precious time we've had with him. Time to say goodbye, times to treasure. He has told me he loves me, and my children. He has heard me say that I love him. It warms my heart to have these special memories and to know that my grandfather loves me, and he loves my darling children. Thanks be to God.

I had better sign off now, I've blogged more than I thought I would and it is now very late!

Emma xx

Getting back on track.

Hi all,

Charles (3) and I have been talking recently about getting back on track with our home schooling adventures. We have, of course, been having lots of adventures but none that we really wanted to blog about.

We were all poorly over Christmas and New Year, and then both children had their birthdays and then we've had some family issues. Unfortunately my paternal grandfather is coming to the end of his life after being poorly for a few months. I've been visiting him as much as I can, daily in fact. The children have missed the time with me, which has been hard. Phillip has been stepping up even more (he's already a super hands on Dad) and doing some home schooling with Charles.

We've been keeping Charles off pre-school this week as I have just needed to be with him. He's a really sensitive soul and has been very attentive. We've done lots of things just the two of us to make up for me being cranky and sad.

Our friends over at www.herewearetogether.com have this great Around the World curriculum that we are going to use some bits of. That is the great thing about home education, we can learn about the countries we want to learn about, when we want to learn about them.

We are learning about a country each month, so watch this space.

Charles is doing really well with his numbers and letters. He is very keen to learn to read and tell the time. He has a tendency to sit down with a workbook and rush through it. So we are trying to do lots of other things that he is interested in so he doesn't just zoom through our pre school curriculum books!

I will pop another post up in a moment with our plans for this month. :)

Emma